i am never going to get used to this being able to be online while in the sky thing!  it makes the flight so much more pleasant and at $12.95 for a six hour flight, i really find the cost/satisfaction ratio extremely reasonable.  i mean a freaking cookie is like $7!  and that lasts about 35 seconds, on a good day.

so i’m flying east – a mandatory trip to westport.  now that i’m knocked up my parents (and, i can admit it, me too) are acutely aware of how far away we are from one another.  when you grow up with all four or your grandparents living in spitting distance from you, 3,000 miles does seem a bit unreasonable.  i’m going so that my mom can make me a cheese souffle and my dad can feed me homemade bagels.

as any reader knows, under the best set of circumstances i’m not the best flyer and under these circumstances i’ve been a nervous wreck.  not because i’m worried about the spawn currently growing inside me.  it will be fine – i’m sure.  but i fear puke and dizziness and general discomfort.  to combat these issues i have packed enough snacks to feed a small pre-school.  sour gummy candy, honeynut cheerios, ginger snaps, prestzel rods, jelly beans, a bagel and cream cheese, taco salad, two different kinds of mints – i could go on.  when i arrived at the airport i also bought a large size FIJI water and i immediately thought of EDDIE who thought this water, coming from FIJI, was dirty water.  he wouldn’t like the fact that i’m drinking it, especially while PREGNANT.  it made me laugh out loud.

between the Dramamine and the snacks and the water and the sea-bands, so far, so good.  being able to work while aboard a flight helps too.  it’s like a typical day except my phone won’t ring.

my parents must really love me, and this spawn, because they are picking me up from JFK right in the heart of rush hour.  i think the plan is to head straight to the diner for a turkey sandwich.

i promise that this entire pregnancy is not about food – although clearly it’s playing a big role.  i’ve been having weird-ass dreams too.  like two nights ago when i dreamt that as a married, pregnant 29-year-old i had to go back to THE BIG M to finish some class that i hadn’t quite finished before.  and i had to wear a uniform.  the craziest part of the dream was that my khaki skirt from 1997 still fit.  unfortunately, just to make life SLIGHTLY more difficult, THE BIG M was in the process of deeming those skirts OUT of uniform, and only approving of the grey flannel skirt which i know longer owned.  luckily, in my dream i was still in touch with some of the girls i went to high school with and so i asked around.  oh they were willing to sell me their skirts, for $300 a piece.  thanks girls, thanks.

alright, it looks like they are almost done with beverage service and this pregnant woman has been sitting for over an hour and needs to empty her bladder.  also it’s 10:23 am and the guy in front of me has already ordered two jack and cokes.  we have 4 1/2 hours left.  AWESOME.